3/4

my college career is 75% complete.


that scares the crap out of me.


what am i going to do? where am i going to go? what is my dad going to say?


i went cycling around campus at midnight tonight, enjoying the stillness, the lights, the wind ruffling my hair. this place means so much to me, more than this blog, or the human voice, could express. God has taken my hand, taken my heart, and done what He wants, most of the time, showing me a life that i didn't realize existed.


this campus brings to life everything in me. it's not the campus itself, it's the tears, the scars, the laughs of a friend: the kind you know have your hand, regardless. the lunches, the all-night shifts at work, the gospel sharing, the sum of a life that was lived without many regrets, at least in this turning of my life.


i still have another year, only the Lord knows what it will bring, and that is a lot of time. in this bittersweet morsel of a memory, i will relish in the times of joy and pain, of exuberance and gut-wrenching tears, of faith and fear. i will live this last year with everything i have, not in the what-if?'s of yesteryear, but in the what-next?'s of now. we have one shot at this, one shot to make it all count, one shot to live this life with full expectation of the life to come. i pray that all of this is a disconnection from this world, for it let's us live for heaven all the more. makes heaven that much sweeter. jesus, please don't allow me to wallow in the nostalgia of memories, but may we leap to see your face all the more, to see your Kingdom reign on this creation. in the vastness of 'I AM', we know nothing of you. may you reveal your heart every day through your church. may we live for the what-next?'s right around the corner.


1/4 left. what will we make of it?