rant.

Thank the Lord for $1.50 movie theatres, because if I had paid any more for my ticket to see The Breakup I would have flipped. If you know me, you know that I think with my heart, that things hit deeper with me than the 'average' person, whatever that means. The entire time we were sitting in this flick, all I could think about is how I want to be the farthest thing away from the character that Vince Vaughn plays. Hollywood has contorted and twisted the image of men and women that sometimes it's hard to see the clear line. Women are made into this adulterous, self-absorbed hootch, while men are degraded into a pile of beer cans, naked women parading around them, with no regard to integrity or honor. Honestly, this bothers me so much. I think it bothers me right now not because that image is being cast upon us men and women of God, but that the world has fallen to such a pit of superficiality that it can't see past the skin. This world continues to see what is in it for itself, what it can get for it's own selfish gain. For some reason, this has moved my heart. Call it compassion, call it pity, call it whatever you may; my heart is crying for something more. Something more than this world can offer. Yes, I have Jesus Christ, and I'm not saying that He's not sufficent, because He surely is! What bothers me is that I feel that, at times, this superficial filth is rubbed off on us. Yes, we are in this world and not of it, and praise the Lord the day that we don't have to be surrounded in this trash, but us a Christians need to be above these things, we need not to be swayed and influenced by our circumstances.

This is how God operates. God is holy, which in turn makes him outside of the influence of anyting in all Creation. The downward spiral that our culture is in doesn't bring Him down, nor make Him less omnipotent. But for some reason now, my heart has never wanted to be more like God than now. I'm so tired and sick of seeing my brothers and sisters be influenced by what is around us. God told us to be holy because He himself was first holy. Our conversations, our choices in entertainment, even our music, is shaded with the trash of this world, some areas more than others.

Something that the Lord has really taught me this summer is the importance of what a man or woman of God talks about. Out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks. How true this is! Listen to a Christian for half an hour in a group setting, and you will start to see what is on their heart. Granted, this quantity of time won't give away all of what is in there, but I'm certain that some key elements of their character will come out. What are they talking about? Food? Music? Sports? Temporal things that really just don't matter? Or are we talking about how God is shaping us into His bride? Are we talking about how we are faithfully carrying out His command to this lost, and obviously, seriously bleeding society? Our culture has suffered a massive blow to the head, bleeding from the inside out, and we don't do anything about it. We think that by our lifestyles we evangelize. No, I'm sorry, it's by the constant dedication to evangelism that shapes our lifestyle. That is the true definition of lifestyle evangelism. How are people going to know of our risen Savior if we don't tell them? How are they going to know of the consequence of sin in their lives and the needed repentance if we don't tell them. How is anyone going to be with us when He comes through the clouds unless we tell them? Unless we stop talking about sports teams that we devote more time to than our time in the Word, stop talking about food that we do or do not like for whatever pointless reason. Granted there is a time and a place for these things, but when the majority of comments made by a person fall under this temporal category, what does that say about the condition of our hearts? We sing songs about how our hearts are totally God's, but do we REALLY mean it? Do we really believe that God is INSIDE of us? Do we really believe that we have a mission here, and that people are hurting and dying in their sin?

I guess what this all boils down to is that my heart is hurting for our Body. That we belive that these things matter, when in reality, they don't. They don't change the course of events of our lives, they don't change eternal destinations, they don't change our character to be more godlike. It's my prayer that God would bring men and women to GCL that have a heart to reach this place, to reach the University of Florida with their whole heart. Titus 2 says that "they profess to know Him, but by their deeds they deny Him." I'm not saying that our brothers and sisters are denying God or Christ, but that our deeds dictate what is really in us, what really makes us tick. That probably isn't the best verse to use, but it's the first one that came to mind. I'm tired of people being afraid or unwilling to put both of their feet in this water of the river of Christ. If you find yourself in this category, I'm praying for you, that God would bring you to a place of complete trust in Him, and that He would completely wrap around your mind, your heart, your words. God WILL build His church, do you want to be a part of it? Come, now is the time...

what lies beneath

We had big plans today for FSUbmerge to go to the springs with the new people we are meeting. I was pretty excited. On the way out I got a call from my dad. "Dave, hope this doesn't ruin your day today, but your cousin Densie drowned yesterday. They found her on the bottom of the lake." Yeah, not a good start to the day today. I only met Denise once when she came down to stay with us for a few days in the Keys. She's my dad's cousin really, married with three kids (17, 13 & 11). This is really tragic, and I might have to leave Tally for a few days, but somehow the Lord will be glorified in this. It's not too rough for me, I didn't know her (how pathetic is that? that my flesh doesn't even want to mourn) but I know it will be very hard for the rest of my family. Please pray for us, that someone will speak the healing words of Jesus Christ. If I go, I definately want to talk with some of my family about Christ, they need to hear this, especially after something like this. Thanks for reading.

30 days to go...

My internship is up in thirty days. It's been an interesting experience, but for some reason it feels like it's just getting started. I feel stronger, wiser, more rational, more faithful, but something feels off. I am really looking forward to going home to Ft. Lauderdale on August 5th for three reasons, one I get to see my family, especially my brother; two is that Richard, my brother and I get to go to a Mae show that is right down the street from my house; and third I get time to sit at the beach and process all of what the Lord has taught me this summer. There is a lot in my head, and I just simply don't have the time to process it all. I am really looking forward to getting home, this is going to be amazing! I had to skip II Kings in order to get almost up to date with my Bible reading, I'll tackle it when I get home, or on the ride home with Pooter (Richard)! Good news though! The one guy that I lead to Christ, Jadarya, he wants to get together this Friday for lunch, so we finally get some discipleship in here for the last few weeks! I'm just praying that he can make a connection with these guys, the Firebrand people, because that's what really matters.

Vaka is on right now, Untitled #1 from ( ), I love this song so much. Just like music always does, it places images, memories, future or past, in my head, in my heart. I think the Lord has really made me differently when it comes to this. I'm sure other people, like Cassie, have this same thing, but music just does it for us. I rememember events so much better with a soundtrack that I make posted to it. This whole album reminds me of the last two years in high school, in the Keys house. I miss that house so much! All the memories of staying up all night before leaving for camp, jumping on the Weiland's trampoline until 2 am with Monte, Waffle House (Awful House?), all the good memories with my friends that are too sweet to let out of my heart. I vividly remember looking out into the southern skys, a moonless night with an undulating blanket of stars to keep me occupied. Thinking of those nights, walking down Atlantic Ave., praying, thinking, praying some more. Watching the Molasses Reef bouy's marker light ebb and flow in the black night warmth. Thinking of how the Lord will use my life, how it will all pan out, thinking of all of my friends, and the mindless times we spent together. Thinking of Monte, how much he poured into my life, how much he helped me understand my faith, understand what I was doing with my life, understand who I was. Thinking of how I've never really cared as much for a friend as I did for Monte, how tightly the Lord knit our hearts together...those memories I will not forget. I refuse to.

So here I am, about to start my second half of college, with a whole new book to write in, a whole new slew of memories, of friends to meet, of days to spend with the Lord. I personally can't wait, and I think that's one of the biggest lessons I've learend out of this whole internship. That friends are invaluable, that we can't live without them, and the memories they leave are some of the sweetest, textured times of my life.

sustainment

I've been back here in Tallahassee for a few days now, got back on Thursday from the Pastor's Conference in Tan-Tar-A, Missouri. Wow, it was incredible!!! Not nearly as amazing as Faithwalkers, but it surely is up there on my list!!! For Sam, Alex and I, it was a litte hard to get a lot out of it because we are not pastors, yet at least, so the topics didn't relate to us AS much, but I know there is a lot that we can apply to our own lives as well as the homegroups that we will be/are leading in Gainesville. Herschel Martindale closed up the conference for us on Wednesday night as he taught through Titus 3.

He presented a point, a key fundamental belief that most Christians miss, I think I may have missed it for a while. It's changed my way of thinking a lot, I've rethought my capabilites, my desires, a lot of stuff. He presented John 14:16-18; "I will ask the Father, and He will give you another Helper, that He may be with you forever; that is the Spirit of truth, whom the world cannot receive, because it does not see Him or know Him, but you know Him because He abides with you and will be in you. I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you."

He, the Holy Spirit, will abide with you, me, us, AND He will be IN us!!!!!! All of us!!!! God is inside me, He's inside you, everyone that accepts Christ as their salvation. How amazing is this? If God's very presence is inside of me, what can I not do? Can I fail? No. Can I quit? Not me. Can I burn out? Yes, if I forget this incredibly important piece of Truth. Can I really do all that Christ wants me to do, even though I don't know exactly what that is yet? Of course! These thoughts of God residing in me has changed the way I've thought about how to overcome sin and temptations, because we are the Temple!

This church plant is hard, it's a little unclear right now of what we are doing, but I will continue to do it. Sam & I are running this joint right now, with Pastor Matt in the hospital and Pastor Ryan up in North Carolina at a conference. It's a little overwhelming, but just enough that I can handle it. They weren't kidding when they said that this was Leadership Training. I love it though, having a lot of fun and getting to meet some cool cats up here. Miss Gainesville a ton though, I can not wait to get back and do the Lord's work with my brothers and sisters up there. He has really knit our hearts together, and it's such a blessing that you can only understand through experience because words can't do it justice. I'm off to the grocery store, so peace out. Chew on that verse though, ok?